I can relate. At 52, I was hesitant to date someone 10 years younger than me but he persisted and I relented and it was great until after three months of spending almost every day together then finally meeting his friends who absolutely loved me, he announced the next morning, "well, you know this is only temporary - eventually I need to be with someone my own age." Wow. such a sucker punch. He thought I was perfect for him in every way except that I was too old.
I struggled with my looks most of my life. Not wanting the male sexual gaze, I shaved my head twice and then spent over 10 years with it very short. It wasn't until my late 40's that I was finally able to settle into my body and grow my hair long for my own sensual enjoyment. A few months back a friend asked why I didn't just let my hair go grey (as it is lightly starting to do) and I admitted it's because I still like sex - and the long dark hair works in that arena. But at least now I know I'm doing it for my own enjoyment and that makes all the difference.
I wrote a post on this - at least about accepting my own face - a few months back titled, "When Your Face Feels Like Home". Maybe you can relate as well.
That's why I hang out with men rather than women. Women can be so petty and short ended. I like rich conversation, sultry eye contact, flirting without following through. I like to have fun. And I am still beautiful at 70 if I take the time to fix up, which I rarely do. It is just not me anymore. I am tired of playing double jeopardy and ready to be real. Deb
I felt invisible in my 50s while I was still covering my gray hair. I find that people in general are kinder to me with my salt and pepper hair. My husband loves the way it catches the light. The only thing I hate about my face is the large age spot on my left cheek. I really don't want to spend a bundle on dealing with it though.
"It isn’t just the looks though. It is clear evidence of the inexorable passage of time, going only one direction. It is the marker that one phase of our lives is over and will never come again. It is a little death, partly of the ego, but deeper than that. No wonder we grieve." Thank you for this thoughtful and insightful essay, Annabel.
I can relate. At 52, I was hesitant to date someone 10 years younger than me but he persisted and I relented and it was great until after three months of spending almost every day together then finally meeting his friends who absolutely loved me, he announced the next morning, "well, you know this is only temporary - eventually I need to be with someone my own age." Wow. such a sucker punch. He thought I was perfect for him in every way except that I was too old.
I struggled with my looks most of my life. Not wanting the male sexual gaze, I shaved my head twice and then spent over 10 years with it very short. It wasn't until my late 40's that I was finally able to settle into my body and grow my hair long for my own sensual enjoyment. A few months back a friend asked why I didn't just let my hair go grey (as it is lightly starting to do) and I admitted it's because I still like sex - and the long dark hair works in that arena. But at least now I know I'm doing it for my own enjoyment and that makes all the difference.
I wrote a post on this - at least about accepting my own face - a few months back titled, "When Your Face Feels Like Home". Maybe you can relate as well.
Cheers to the Crone Years!
Great article Annabel! Looking at your recent picture I noticed you have great skin! I formulate organic facial skin care. It's my business to notice.
That's why I hang out with men rather than women. Women can be so petty and short ended. I like rich conversation, sultry eye contact, flirting without following through. I like to have fun. And I am still beautiful at 70 if I take the time to fix up, which I rarely do. It is just not me anymore. I am tired of playing double jeopardy and ready to be real. Deb
I felt invisible in my 50s while I was still covering my gray hair. I find that people in general are kinder to me with my salt and pepper hair. My husband loves the way it catches the light. The only thing I hate about my face is the large age spot on my left cheek. I really don't want to spend a bundle on dealing with it though.
"It isn’t just the looks though. It is clear evidence of the inexorable passage of time, going only one direction. It is the marker that one phase of our lives is over and will never come again. It is a little death, partly of the ego, but deeper than that. No wonder we grieve." Thank you for this thoughtful and insightful essay, Annabel.